It started off with us barely talking on the night of Looze Control (which we won). At first, I didn't talk because I was nervous, scared, afraid of performing. I know that we perform all the time but this time it just got to me, because I never get nervous. Then, when we were on the train, I tried everything, all my best efforts to make him comfortable, yet I couldn't succeed and it just annoyed me. Ended up sleeping on each other and then we had to get off. While walking, we didn't talk either, and that just made me worse..

I hate being talked to when I'm annoyed, but the only person I want and need talking to me is Morokot. He is seriously the only thing that makes everything better. Whether I respond or not, I just need his voice to comfort me. When we got home, we barely said a word to each other, and got on opposite sides of the bed, rather than sleep together, and then we fell asleep straight away.. We didn't even have sex, which surprised me, because we usually do it even if we're tired or not.

In the morning, he woke up for work, and it's like nothing happened the night before, and I thought he left in a good mood. When I was on my way to dancing, I got a message from him saying that his sister invited us to dinner, but the way I interpreted his replies wasn't good lol.. So I got angry, and said I wasn't going to go, along with some blunt and short replies since I felt like I was annoying him. I even said, that I felt like I was annoying him, and what did I get in return? "Aww. Okay then". I ended up getting pissed off like no tomorrow and started crying on the bus, like the idiot that I am. I stood outside Glen's house for a good 20 minutes trying to clean myself up so no one would know I was crying. When I got to dance, I didn't talk to anyone for atleast 4 hours. When Gerina arrived, I finally started talking, and ended up telling her everything. Morokot texted me while I was at the Filo fest, and all I gave were stupid replies, he could tell something was up, and told me to tell him when I was ready to talk about it.

I didn't reply until around 3-4 am. I was so dead, yet, I couldn't sleep because that was on my mind the whole time. I sent him a text saying what was up, and why I acted like I did. Turns out I wasn't annoying him, and he felt the same. Also turns out that I need to chill the eff out about stupid shit like that lol. During the day he messaged me back, and we sorted things out. He told me to come over and so I did. We had tacos for dinner that Simalis made, and we finished watching Shawshank redemption which, surprisingly, I really really liked :) Watched some tv while making out and eventually had sex LOL which had to be quiet because his sisters room and parents room are right near his lulz. And then we just chilled in his bed until he had to study. I just watched tv until I fell asleep.

In the morning, he went driving and then went for his P's test. He finally got them after the 3rd try, yay! He also made fun of how I slept, called me cute, and recorded himself doing stupid shit to me LOL. Then we went driving to maccas and bumped into Robert, then he drove me home since he had to go to the library to study. I don't know why, but him driving and me right next to him, holding his hand was exciting :3 It also made me feel 48375934859 times better, since all that shit happened. I got home and jumped on twitter for the first time in ages and I saw some of his tweets. On the day that we had that fight, I saw one of his tweets that said "Sigh sigh sigh". I don't know if that was because of what happened but it was cute. And then I saw other tweets about me, like "studying while the gf is asleep on me" "@kimnanas is a qt when she sleeps" and I don't know why but they just gave me butterflies.

I sat on my bed for about 20 minutes, thinking about what I did to deserve a boy like him, and how lucky I am. I got teary for some reason LOL, I don't know why. There are so many ups and downs to loving someone and letting yourself go.. But I swear, it makes you feel so good. I haven't felt this good in so long. I haven't been this happy for this long and ages, and I hope it stays like this. Because I love you.